Compassion - Amy

Although I spent six months living in the 1304 community and have spent almost seven years calling myself a Christian, it is STILL hard for me to choose God's interests over my own pursuits. I get caught up in living the ideal "college life" and forget that Jesus doesn't call me to get straight A's but to pursue him. And yet I continue to struggle with making the choice to serve God rather than myself.

This week has been different; I intentionally sought out homeless folk on the off-ramps. I ended up meeting someone who just... broke my heart. When I first met Iva, her face was covered with dark bruises and she had a huge gash across her forehead. She's in a really abusive relationship with her husband, but still stays with him in order to support him and her family- because she loves them. She stands on the corner for hours on end to in order to scrape together enough money to fulfill her daily quota given to her by her husband. As she spoke to me, she started to cry. I stood there awkwardly because I just didn't know what to do. I ended up patting her on the shoulder and offering money, condolences, and prayer.

I spent a rather fitful night thinking about that experience. I just didn't feel right about it. I didn't feel like I had really shown her love- godly love. I was still pursing my own interests- I was offering her the right things, but I wasn't really offering her any of myself. The next day I went back to see her and we talked again. This time when she started to cry I didn't hesitate, I jumped up and gave her a huge hug. We stood on the corner of the off ramp, embracing, for about two or three minutes while she cried into my shoulder. This, this is love, compassion.

I forget things like this when I'm immersed in college life. I forget the power of God's love. I forget the serving God not only breaks you, but create you anew.